Friends, it’s happened . . . as of yesterday, July 27th, I officially hit my long-term goal of losing 60 lbs. Truth? It was a bit anti-climatic. Am I happy about it? Wildly. Am I proud? Definitely. Does it change anything? It does, but not like I thought.
It’s funny that I am at this place all these months later – approximately 7, and what I want to say to you is that the number on the scale really does not define who you are. No matter how the numbers change, no matter what my jeans size reads, I am still me. Confidence, being appreciative of God’s magnificent creation (YOU!), joy – these things don’t automatically accompany weight loss. In fact, I’d say that true lasting overall change starts from the inside and works its way out.
Before I could lose the weight I had to get real about why I gained the weight in the first place. Why was I medicating with food? Why wasn’t I taking care of my body? It was when God began to shed light on some of these darkest of places in my heart that I could start to tackle the weight loss. And as the pounds began to drop off, God continued to chip away at the real issues, the heart issues (which are still far from resolved, hello – human, born sinful, work in progress, Amen?)
Weight loss is a cake walk compared to the chipping away of junk in my heart.
Do you know what friends and strangers alike have commented on the most since my journey started in January? The light in my eyes and the smile on my face. Real change, real joy shines through. It can’t be contained. It’s not a result of clean eating or even running – it’s a result of a changed heart, of a deep gratitude of the thousands of gifts He gives. That God could change me like this and allow me what I consider a second chance to be and do what He created me to be – amazing.
And this is the part where I pretend like I am getting a weight-loss oscar, and I thank all my friends and family . . . minus the cut-off music. Thank you to my best friends Kris and Syndi who have stood by me through thick and thin (ha, get it?! PUN totally intended!) we are the three trees girls, and I cannot imagine life without you both. I love you! Thanks to my kids who have grinned and bared it through a huge menu change (clean eating is not an easy change for kids!) and for allowing me to drag them to the YMCA and runs in the park with the jogging stroller – Jonah, you are a trooper! (He is nearly 8 and his longest distance run is 3 miles!) Thanks to my parents who brag on me and keep me grounded at the same time. To my friend Matt who got me hooked on running, I am eternally grateful for that! For my running partners Evelyn, Kat and Rachel – I love you girls! To Laura who schooled me on clean eating and continues to, she is the best cook I know hands down! To all my amazing friends and church family whose encouragement, kind words and donations of clothing (cause I can’t afford myself!) and a jogging stroller have made this possible. To my running group – Run Baby Run – you girls amaze and astound me daily. Keep it up! And of course, my readers, thanks for slogging through these posts. I honestly don’t know why you keep coming back, but I am so glad you do.
Most of all, thank you Jesus for loving me, overweight or not. For giving your life away so I could spend mine with you. For this amazing life I get to live and these amazing people you’ve put in my life. For every gift large and small – I am so grateful.