Fingernails

I’m traumatized ya’ll.  What started out last night as a pleasant evening complete with homemade quesadillas and what I have dubbed “As Good as It Gets for You Guacamole” quickly spiraled into a tantrum-filled mess. 

What started the craziness?  Fingernails.  The mind of a four-year-old really is a mysterious thing.  What was not a big deal last year, or last month for that matter is now a very big deal.  Fingernails.  About a month ago I noticed that Jonah’s were starting to look Freddy Kruegerish.  So I mentioned to Jonah that we needed to clip his nails, and he responded with a rather loud protest and ran away.  I shrugged it off as Jonah being strange – because anyone with a four-year-old knows that odd, erratic behavior is actually pretty normal.  I should have gotten a clue in this case!

Last night at dinner I noticed that his fingernails really were looking gross.  It was time.  So after Jonah got on his jammies I got out the clippers, lotion – the works, attempting to make it a “fun” expereince.  Ha.  As soon as Jason sat him down to get it over with our usually compliant child went into an absolute fit screaming, and I mean SCREAMING, “No!  No! No!  I don’t want to!  You’ll hurt me!  I want to go to bed!”  This was accompanied by an impressive show of strength as he thrashed, kicked and did everything in his power to run away.

I don’t get it.  I’m the only one who has ever clipped his nails, and I don’t recall ever accidentally clipping off any fingers or hurting him at all for that matter. We tried to rationalize with him.  We started to get peeved and took away some of his toys . . . I knew that we weren’t going to win this one when he began to voluntarily give away his things to get out of the nail clipping. 

After a stern lecture from each of us on why it is never okay to scream bloody murder in your parents’ faces, we put Jonah to bed and clipped his nails once he was asleep.  We live in a townhouse/duplex, and I am praying that my neighbors aren’t convinced that we spent the evening torturing our kid. 

After Jason and I straggled downstairs he says, “Well I think we’ve learned two important lessons here.  You can’t reason with a four-year-old and clip his nails when he’s asleep.”  Well said, my man.  Well said.

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