I’m excited. I got to see my good friend, Julie not one, but two days in a row! Yay! I really can’t say enough good things about friends you can be real with. They pretty much rock. Anyhow, enough gushing!
At Bible study last night, which turned out to be just me and Julie which was really no biggie, we began talking about motherhood. Since we’re in the throes of it and still novices, it’s a pretty popular topic with us. We began to talk about the interesting dynamic of relationships between moms, particularly the no-holds-barred attitude many have when it comes to giving unwarranted advice to other moms, even if they are only acquaintances.
For now, and maybe for always (only God knows!) Jonah is an only child. I really don’t know if we are going to add another baby to our little family, and frankly – I don’t know that we want to. For a time, I went through a season of really wanting to have another . . . coincidentally, or not, Jonah was also begging for a sibling. We tried, no preggo. After some soul searching and a lot of prayer, the desire diminished, and Jonah stopped begging.
I mentioned this to another mom and she just looked shocked down to the ground – how could I subject my poor son to a life of solitude? Or that’s how it came across at least. I mean, really – what’s wrong with being an only child? I asked me sister-in-law this who has 3, and she was so encouraging. “there are pros and cons to everything,” she said. I agree. Still, that other mom’s comment wasn’t the first bit of unwarranted advice I’ve received since joining the ranks of motherhood. I won’t re-hash all those stories and villanize these women – their intentions were good. I think. Then again, that old saying goes that “the road to hell is paved with good intentions.”
So Julie and I were talking about this and we wondered, why are moms so stinkin’ judgemental of one another (in general)? Whether Christian or not, I have heard way to many moms bash other moms about everything from parenting styles to kids’ behavior to staying at home vs working. Enough! Rom 14:13 Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather determine this–not to put an obstacle or a stumbling block in a brother’s way.
Could it be that sometimes we’re not too happy with us or the way we parent, so we project that onto other moms – just hoping to feel relief from the guilt of not being supermom? Listen, parenting is hard – period. We’re entrusted with these little people who we’re responsible for teaching everything to all while cleaning up messes, breaking up fights, and praying like crazy. If anything, shouldn’t we give each other a break?
Okay, stepping down from the soapbox now. 🙂 I just admonish all of you mamas out there, mamas to be, and those of you who will be there someday – Mat 7:1 “Do not judge so that you will not be judged.
Mat 7:2 “For in the way you judge, you will be judged; and by your standard of measure, it will be measured to you. Mat 7:3 “Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Mat 7:4 “Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ and behold, the log is in your own eye? Mat 7:5 “You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.
Jam 5:16 Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed. The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much.